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Film Review – The Men Who Stare At Goats
The Men Who Stare At Goats – This is a story about a reporter (Ewan McGregor) who interviews who he thinks is a crazy person (played by Stephen Root) who talks about being trained by the military to stare down animals and ultimately kill them…
READ MOREFilm Review – The Human Centipede (First Sequence)
I had wanted to see Human Centipede since I figured out the preview/trailer wasn’t a joke. Seriously, the drawing by the doctor as to what he’s trying to create is 1st-grade-art-class level stuff. Doctor sews three people together – there’s the plot. Alright, there’s a…
READ MOREFilm Review – The Pope’s Toilet
It is 1988, and there is small village in Uruguay that the Pope is coming to visit – a once in a lifetime event. The whole village is trying to figure out a way to capitalize on his visit – literally capitalize since they’re setting…
READ MOREFilm Review – Love and Other Drugs
I knew this movie was a depressing chick flick, but I was still game to see it. Here’s why – I’m a sucker for Jake Gyllenhaal (and his wack job sister Maggie), and my grandmother has Parkinson’s (which is what the movie is about). (Plus…
READ MOREFilm Review – Ninja Death
Ninja Death – I love old traditional kung fu films. It reminds me of my youth when I watched hours and hours of Kung Fu Theater. And since I was a hormonally-riddled teen when this was airing, I secretly hoped to see a scantily clad…
READ MOREFilm Review – Roller Blade Seven
Roller Blade Seven is a really awful post-apocalyptic movie by this terrible director who puts roller skates, roller blades, and skateboards in a bunch of movies that are all stupid. I’m a bit confused about the plot of this movie. It’s kind of like Mad…
READ MOREFilm Review – Nun of That
Nun of That is a pretty awful shoot ‘em up movie involving a vigilante group of nuns actually working for the Vatican and fighting crime – they’re called the Order of the Black Habit. All of the nuns are named after the seven deadly sins.…
READ MOREFilm Review – Shaolin vs. Evil Dead
For those of you not well-versed in traditional kung-fu movies, vampires are white-faced and hop around with their arms out. This movie explains that a monk walking in front of the vampires rings a bell to intentionally make them hop and keep their arms out.…
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