Film Review – Boondock Saints 2: All Saints Day

Boondock Saints 2: All Saints Day – I had really high hopes for this movie, despite the whole “sequel is never as good as the original” curse. I thought, same people, same sort of story line, what could go wrong? The answer? Everything.

Before I start complaining, I’ll give you the plot. Someone kills a priest in a catholic church and puts pennies over his dead eyes to indicate it’s the “Saints” (the brothers/father team of Irish guys who kill bad guys while reciting scripture). The killer is drawing the Saints out of hiding by framing them, which is successful. The FBI shows up and helps with the investigation, along with the same three crooked cops that helped the saints the first time around. Shoot up half a ton of bad Italian mobsters and you’ve got your plot – complete with an obvious set up for a third film in the series.

Do yourself a huge favor and skip this film, I can’t explain the depths of terrible acting, terrible script, terrible jokes, terrible CGI, terrible backgrounds, terrible sets, terrible music, terrible hand gestures, terrible wind machines, terrible flashbacks, terrible dialogue, terrible gun-vests, a terrible whorey lead FBI agent (Julie Benz) who has terrible shoes, a terrible walk, a terrible gun belt, and a terrible accent. The bad guy at the end, “The Roman”, was played by Peter Fonda with the worst Italian accent I’ve ever heard – on top of which, the scene is confusing and you don’t know if the saints are killing bad guys or FBI agents (Hello, Clarity? You’re busy right now? Ahh we don’t need you for this scene. It’s fine.). There’s a terrible dream sequence with David Della Rocco who comes back from the dead and spouts ridiculous lines that make no sense. Duffy tried to add in comedy that wasn’t needed, nor was appropriate, nor was funny! And why did the saints need a sidekick in this film? Cause he’s “loco”? It’s just asinine.

I would have yelled “bull shit” sooooo many times during this film if I were at home, but I wasn’t drunk in the theater unlike the person who stood up and egged Billy Connolly on whenever he would show up. I’m just as angry now after writing this review as I was after watching this film in the theater. Complete waste of time and now I’m embarrassed for having wanted to see it.

(ZERO out of 5 fus) (aka Movie Fail)
Number of times I used the word “terrible” to describe this film: 18


I'm a cross between Taylor Swift and Danzig, with a small dose of Christpher Burke thrown in. I like fried foods wrapped in bacon and I collect B-movies and kung-fu films. I host a regularly-occuring Bad Movie Night for 20-30 of my closest friends—jealous, aren't you?

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