Schlock Shelf – Hobo With a Shotgun

Hobo With a Shotgun is a grindhouse film about a transient man (played by Rutger Hauer) who rolls into a town under the control of Drake—a really bad guy. Rutger blasts his way through the town, despite the townspeople having turned on him. With the help of a lady friend he meets, Rutger dishes out some serious vigilante justice.

The movie starts with Rutger Hauer out on the railroad traveling. He sees this guy with a manhole cover around his neck (Ricky from Trailer Park Boys). This family of bad people (who wear letterman jackets) end up chasing him down and killing him in front of a crowd of people. It’s gruesome and disturbing, but weird. The whole town looks like it’s falling apart. Like some sort of post-apocalypse scenario. There are crazy anarchy punk rock kids beating up and torturing homeless people, and all the punks are being managed by the same bad kids’ family that killed Ricky. All these bad kids wear letterman jackets, so they’re easy to spot.

Rutger steps in and makes a citizen’s arrest on one of the boys when he tries to have his way with a lady. Then things get bloody—really bloody. The lady then has to help Rutger out of a situation. Rutger is trying to save money for a lawnmower (yes, really) and is trying to scrape by with his street skills. He’s also on a mission to beat up bad guys. This is where the shotgun comes in handy. Rutger’s on a rampage. And also swigging hooch out of a flask. He’s done terrible things to save up enough money to buy the lawnmower, but he decides the shotgun will come in handy more often than the lawnmower.

The bad guys send out a message to the citizens of the town telling the citizens to help them hunt down and kill all the homeless people who are wrecking the town. The bad guys are getting fed up with Rutger mowing down their people. Soon, there’s a pile of homeless persons and the streets still aren’t safe. The bad kids go after Rutger, but things don’t go so well for them. In the meantime, Rutger’s friend takes a tree saw to the neck and he’s got to get her to the hospital to get patched up. While they’re in the hospital, Rutger takes a moment to go to the birth ward to give the newborns a little pep talk.

The bad guy leader has sent some henchmen out to capture Rutger and bring him back to their lair. The girl goes after the henchmen to bring back Rutger, but not before she slaps on those hilarious slap bracelets the kids had in the ’90s. Then it’s time to kick ass. The bad guys have designed a little show for an audience—a show filled with all kinds of blood and fire. It’s a pretty big deal.

This film had the grindhouse feel to it, with all kinds of gritty action and sub-standard gorey special effects. I won’t say it’s bad, but with a name like Hobo With a Shotgun, I suppose I had higher expectations for this film. It was a decent movie, but didn’t do much for me and I was glad it was over. It could have used more camp, more blood, more plot twists, or a few other things to make it more memorable, but it didn’t have enough good things going for it for me to be able to recommend it to people.

(2 out of 5 fus)

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I'm a cross between Taylor Swift and Danzig, with a small dose of Christpher Burke thrown in. I like fried foods wrapped in bacon and I collect B-movies and kung-fu films. I host a regularly-occuring Bad Movie Night for 20-30 of my closest friends—jealous, aren't you?

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