Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen – A Poem

June 16th, 2010 | POSTED BY Allen Almachar

Once upon a time,

in a land so far away,

there was an action director,

by the name of Michael Bay.

With music videos,

the camera was his toy,

he then went on to movies,

the first was called Bad Boys (1995).

Flash forward to the future,

destiny was a-callin’,

he would eventually direct,

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009).

This movie is so silly,

this movie is so dumb,

is this what people think,

of action-movie fun?

The dude’s name is Shia,

the girl’s last name is Fox,

but every single character,

is simply dumb as rocks.

The story is confusing,

and no one seems to care,

that people can survive,

being flung through the air.

The robots look a mess,

like metal from the crapper,

and why do the twins,

act like stupid rappers?

The actors don’t do much,

besides scream and run,

Megan Fox is only used,

for her cleavage and her bum.

And why does the army,

think they have effect?

One kick from Decepticons,

will leave them in a wreck.

His style hasn’t changed,

Michael Bay has no notion,

to film an action scene,

without the bad slow-motion.

It’s simply way too loud,

it simply goes forever,

What the hell, John Turturro?

You’ve been in so much better.

This movie is not funny,

really not at all,

with the dogs humping,

and the robot with the balls.

There’s lots of “booms” and “pows”,

it simply does not end.

Exactly like the first,

but they did it all again.

Come on, Michael Bay,

your movies used to pop,

Remember when you made,

a good one like The Rock (1996)?

I really don’t look forward,

to the film, Transformers 3,

I’ll only watch that stuff,

when it’s playing on TV.

I really need to stop,

it’s starting to get late,

this movie is not good,

is how I’d like to rate.

The End.

How Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen should have ended:

Bad Boys, John Turturro, Megan Fox, Michael Bay, Shia LaBeouf, The Rock, Transformers 2, Transformers: revenge of the fallen